Home sick. After two days indoors, riding it out (much like my Florida friends are doing right now, be safe), I had to get out and get some goodies to help me coast through the ickiness. To the right is my arsenal...lovely tea, bee pollen granules on applesauce, Manuka honey lozenges, used some essential oils in my tea and water today... steam... naps...and yesterday's pot of homemade soup. Today, I had to get out of the house. I just saw myself moping in bed...thinking...I am sitting at the scene of the crime. Breathing in the same air, stuck in the same thoughts. GET OUT! So I drove out to Huntington Village.
It's been quite a while since I've been sick, I don't think I've been ill in a year or so. :knocks on wood: And of course, as things do, it's really got me thinking.
Why haven't I been sick? A valid question. I used to get colds constantly, I used be achey and whiny all the time. I used to be obese, too, and still shocked when I fit into smaller sizes. (And I still whine often, don't worry, I am in fact human.)
All I can figure is that I was living in constant stress, in that former life. Not to mention the not taking care of myself part.
Without delving into the past, I just want to say how important it is to tend to one's own needs. And to get to a place where we know how to discern what those needs are. And there isn't one stock answer on how to do this. And why is this even a thing? Why is it so hard for some of us...to allow that? Why are we so driven to push and pull and deplete and exhaust ourselves? Who are we trying to impress? (Newsflash: whoever it is, they don't care.) I know I'm not alone in this: within the past year alone, mostly since I finished the book, I've become a magnet for empathic, sensitive, free-spirited women. Some of them don't know how amazing they truly are, some of them are light years ahead of me. I love that.
Just tonight, at a favorite, new to me, lovely shop, I had a talk with a woman (total girl-crush on her gorgeous red hair...wow). Self-professed hippie. Me too, I said! We couldn't stop gabbing, such a lovely soul she is. We were talking about the propensity for sensitive folks like us to be drawn to head-strong, in-the-box, must-be-right thinkers. The hustle and grinders, the cold, hard, fact pursuers. And why? Why, why, why, are we? They can eat us up and spit us out, why do we go? She seemed to have a good strong sense of boundary-setting and knowing her limits. (Also bought this gorgeous lotion and the softest flannel shirt ever there...because...I decided that I deserve presents as well as presence, today.)
In the past two days, I've come to realize or remember a few things. Balance. I've always been drawn to the old ways and I still am. Back in the nineties, I was on a quest for all things ancient, mystical, and spiritual. These ideas felt more like me than anything that exists today. This quest continues, to this day... although I had quite a pause in the middle. But what I am now remembering and choosing to honor and focus on, is balance. Regarding the Earth as our mother, we can witness miracles, everyday. Just in the simplest acts of nature. The natural world...IS the magic...and we are a part of that world.
The water of Life. Water that sustains us, feeds vegetation and every species on this planet, just about. The water that our Indigenous ones are standing to protect right now. I won't get into an argument about pipelines and so forth, because it's about more than that. The pipeline was the impetus, the catalyst for this epic coming together. Our early brothers and sisters understood the psycho-physical-spiritual connection to the Earth and it's time that all of this comes back, when our Earth mother needs it to. When humanity needs it to. And have we learned? Will we choose profit over humanity...again? Everything comes back until we learn the lesson. Everything. I am still hopeful.
Air, fire, earth, water. These are the basic building blocks of life. Harnessed, utilized, and cherished...through Spirit. These old beliefs, not that old in the scheme of things, helped us to maintain a connection to our environment, our home. We understood how connected we all are...from the microbe to the ocean. From the human body to the universe itself. Insects, animals, people, trees, birds, oceans, dirt, the wind. All interconnected and interdependent. So therefore, homeostasis and balance were the forefront of their decisions and motivations, from planting and harvesting, to their hunt, to meeting other tribes, to marriages and relationships, and so on. Some call old Native beliefs spiritual hocus-pocus, but friends...they were not. The underpinnings of these beliefs were scientific and nature-based and not unique to the U.S. Indigenous cultures all over the globe understood these things. Pagans (which simply denotes any religions that were not Christianity) and other early civilizations understood these things.
Somewhere, as we became "civilized," we gave away this power to controlling bodies: big agriculture, medicine, government, etc... Becoming civilized took away the tenets of our civilization. Ironic. Today, we are completely dependent on infrastructure that is mediocre and utterly flawed (ironically, while the hypocrite types on her Macbook), and which depends upon limited resources. The insanity is that alternatives exist and are waiting to come into play. Energy. How do we provide energy, electricity, power? Read about Tesla, if you haven't. I admit, I have frustrations with this and it's a nearly daily practice of letting go of the stress that it causes me. Why not change, when we can? Why? Sometimes it makes me so angry that we got here and sometimes...that anger gets out and spills onto everything. Anyway, I have to proactively change my mindset to focus on positive ways to work toward a better world...in my own life, as one woman, making simple, everyday decisions. And I consider it to be part of my purpose to encourage others, quietly or loudly, verbally or through example, to do the same.
I digress...the point is...empathic, peacekeeping folks are drawn to their opposites because of an innate desire to find balance. Yin and yang. Light and dark. Moon and sun. If we are more light and seek to avoid conflict and stay joyful and inspired and so on, we are drawn to darkness and mystery and strength to protect our perceived weaknesses. It's about seeking balance. The trouble is, oftentimes, the allure is more trouble than it's worth.
Now, of course, we seek to provide balance within. To find and draw out the dark and love all of it, rather than seeking the dark outside of us. But make no mistake, the end game is always...balance. Equilibrium.
Tending a cold: it's about more than decongestants. Just as our world is made up of numerous systems, working together, so too are our bodies. Gut flora, bacteria, white and red blood cells, blood sugar, hormones, life-force energy, muscles, and so on. Recovering from physical illness has as much to do with our mental and spiritual state...as it does our bodies. I've gargled, taken in steam, rested, ate soup, all of it. And they all did their part, little by little. Time and rest is crucial, to be certain. But also... came the idea that...I could choose not to be sick anymore. Thoughts matter. Intentions matter. With all of the physical and herbal tricks up my sleeve utilized...I meditated. This is where we access our true gifts. And here, I was able to remove all the toxic thoughts that were causing toxic buildup, physically. Make sense? Well, it works, when I get my head out of my ass and remember to make time to do it. Consider the placebo effect...how could the human body have the same healing effects with a sugar pill...as it does with a prescribed medication? Because the control group thought that it was taking the meds that would cure them. Which shows us, plainly, how much power the mind has over our other systems.
So, with a healthy mindset and a recovering body, I needed fresh air... and I have to say I'm feeling so much better overall. No drugs. Passed a new place while I was out, that offered me a free detox foot bath if I listened to a consultation. So curious...they do all sorts of alkalinizing therapies and such. I'll check it out tomorrow. Can't fight free.
Balance, balance, balance. Now, to practice holding and keeping it despite...obstacles.
Time for some medicinal wine. ;-)
Goodnight. Be blessed. xoxo