I see over and over, so many of us, caught in past hurt. If we've been lied to, manipulated, abused, taken advantage of...from the seemingly innocent mistake to the unthinkable acts of cruelty...our first reaction is to retaliate. Seek revenge. To blame. To call someone out, to be right, to preserve ourselves, and to heal. And these are all important. Tending to ourselves is vital. We must allow ourselves to heal over.
I think it's important to remember, as we go forward in our lives, that we have a choice.
Surely, we carry those hurts and scars with us. But our skin gets thicker. We get smarter. We have a choice in how we live our lives. To constantly turn over what someone did or how we were affected, can be damaging to us.
Choose to forgive. Forgive ourselves, forgive others, and make better choices going forward. Forgive ourselves for not knowing then...what we do now. And trusting in ourselves to be more aware and to make better decisions as we experience new things.
I think we need to find a way to let go of it all. Release the need to keep that cycle of repetition going, overanalyzing, overthinking, rationalizing. Let it go. And it's all the time, this letting go. It's every day, until it becomes the new normal. Understand that it's in the past, and that we have right now...this moment...and each new moment ahead of us, to make different choices.
It's good to embrace pain and hurt, it helps us to know and understand ourselves, and thereby, each other. But to stay there, to keep churning it out, over and over, serves no one. Least of all ourselves.
We all have to walk through something. We all carry hurt with us. We've all made mistakes. We're human. But every moment is new. Imagine that? The past...is in the past.
Starting right now, in this moment, we can start to create something new. Find small things to celebrate, to notice. Instead of focusing energy and thoughts on the negative, instead of blaming...we can imagine what we DO want. Create a new space, a neutral space. Fill it with positive ideas and thoughts. Smiles. Create better memories. Choose new moments that fill us up with joy, rather than clinging to times when we felt depleted, worrying that it might happen again.
Why do we do that? Sometimes, it feels familiar. We know how our pain works. We get it. We use it as armor, to protect us from future wounds. But what if we simply let go of that, and allowed new moments of beauty and simple joy to fill us instead? Energy flows where our thoughts go. If we're stuck in a cycle of doubt or blame or fear...it's time to reassess. Choose new thoughts.
The beauty of not knowing...is that what hasn't happened yet...simply hasn't happened yet. There is no right way to feel about it, because it's imaginary. The past is behind us, the future is ahead of us, waiting to be written. And this can apply to anything, to anyone. I think the majority of us have anxiety...a constant worry and need to analyze things and situations that haven't occurred yet. This can be so limiting.
Let the pain go and the story that goes with it. Allow that new space, which may feel empty, at first...to fill back up. With something beautiful. See misery, and that's what you'll get. See beauty, and that's what you'll get. It's all a matter of perspective. Don't let the ugliness and hurtful nature of some get inside of you. If it does, we don't have to let it stay. We can kick it out, like an unwelcome guest. Mind your thoughts, they create reality.
Our thoughts...create reality. Know what you want. The more we focus on pain, the more we'll get.
Free yourself. :) We're allowed to be happy in a world that believes otherwise. But we're changing. Don't you feel it? Embrace it. Tell yourself good things, imagine wonderful things to come, not vice versa.
A simple change in our thoughts...can change our lives. It already has. Let's open our eyes and participate.